It was a perfect day, sun shining, not a cloud in the sky. Suddenly this space ship appears and lands in the back  yard. 

A squatty-looking blob like creature emerged and somehow asked if I had a flexible metal hose and a pie tin, both of which I possessed. Seems the refibulator on the craft malfunctioned and... whump...there it/he was.

I gladly handed over the requests and the grateful ET (Extra Terrestrial) then wanted to thank me for not only being gracious, but also requested my complete secrecy over the dilemma. "Of course, little buddy, no problem," I replied.

In return he said he would grant me any of several options including eternal life.

"Ahh, no thanks", I politely declined. He seemed a bit baffled by my response. "Without an end there really is no meaning to life. If I was to choose eternal life I would lose everyone around me, family, friends.

 The odd fellow then offered to replace any missing organs lost over the years due to disease, or whatever. Again, I declined.

He next suggested that perhaps the rheumatoid arthritis plaguing me in my age status could be eliminated. I thought for a brief moment about easing of pain in my joints, but again refused his offer.

Then a furry of thoughts came spewing out of his apparent frustrated mouth area. World peace, elimination of hunger,  doing away of any and all political furor? Although tempting, his escalated verbiage rang hollow.

"I hate to say this, but without conflict, we are not human. Part of us always wants better than our neighbor. Politics, right, or wrong is what we actually thrive upon." I tried to explain that without good or bad we would lose the human frailty. Without challenge we humans cease to exist. We strive for the next level, the next invention, solution to make life seemingly better.

ET began to sweat bullets. He simply could not grasp the human existence. He then offered to become visible to all humanity, forever ending the question of flying saucers, life on other planets, space, the final frontier that, obviously, his kind had conquered.

"Naw" I exclaimed. Mystery is what we thrive upon. It gives us stories, movies, bad TV shows, good and questionable music, memories. I firmly stated that without all the conflict and ailments in life, there is no life. "Oh, sure, we, as humans, strive for perfection, but that is life itself," I exclaimed firmly.

I attempted to explain love, but he suggested ‘love’ was only for procreation where he came from. I thought how sad his eternal life must be.

Totally miffed,he shook what I believe was his head and turned towards his now running space craft. He briefly looked back and said humans were a stupid bunch of creations.

Perhaps I agreed, but at least we have metal hoses and pie pans that make your space ship perfect once again.

As he jetted off, in a split moment I noticed dark clouds approaching from the west. Looks like a bit of rain heading this way, I thought. So much for the perfect day.

I went inside our house and told Wife Patti that I just conversed with a space alien. 

She nodded her head and reminded me I had forgotten to take my morning pills and perhaps another visit to a doctor was in line.